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Post by LuLu on Jun 1, 2013 0:20:52 GMT -5
Three nuns were talking. The first nun said, "The other day, I was cleaning Father McInty's room and I found pornographic magazines under his bed!"
The second nun said, "I can top that. Yesterday I was cleaning Father McInty's room and I found some condoms!"
The other nuns asked, "What did you do with them?"
The second nun said, "I poked holes in them."
The third nun fainted.
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Post by LuLu on Jun 2, 2013 22:52:36 GMT -5
Senior Moment
An old man goes to a Social Security office to apply for benefits but forgets his ID. The social worker says, "Just unbutton your shirt."
The old man complies, and the social worker says, "The gray chest hairs are all the proof I need," and gives him his check.
The man tells his wife, who responds, "If you'd dropped your pants, you'd have gotten disability, too!"
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Post by LuLu on Jun 3, 2013 22:32:50 GMT -5
Jokes..Small Things, Big Packages
A girls puts an ad online requesting a man who won't hit her or leave her and is a great lover.
A few days later her doorbell rings and she finds a man with no arms and no legs.
He says to her, "I have no arms, so I can't hit you, and I have no legs, so I can't run."
She responds, "But the last part..."
He grins and says, "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"
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Post by LuLu on Jun 4, 2013 23:22:58 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 5, 2013 23:33:19 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 6, 2013 22:57:34 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 7, 2013 22:52:33 GMT -5
I am a prosecuting attorney in a small Mississippi town and will admit to having a few extra pounds on me. Not long ago, I was questioning a witness in an armed robbery case. I asked, "Would you describe the person you saw?" The witness replied, "He was kind of short and stout." "You mean short and stout like me?" I asked. "Oh, no," the witness said. "He wasn't that fat."
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Post by LuLu on Jun 8, 2013 22:42:45 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 9, 2013 23:16:13 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 10, 2013 22:35:58 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 11, 2013 23:27:03 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 12, 2013 23:16:26 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 13, 2013 23:24:14 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 14, 2013 23:34:16 GMT -5
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Post by LuLu on Jun 15, 2013 23:03:29 GMT -5
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